Science Confirms Men and Women Never Meant To Be More Than Friends
UPSALA, SWEDEN—In a shocking reversal of thousands of years of thinking on human reproduction, researchers at the Swedish Collegium for Advanced Study in the Social Sciences announced Monday that sexual contact is a genetic accident, and men and women originally evolved to just be good buds. "Using DNA evidence unavailable until the completed mapping of the human genome, we can now definitively state that the two genders were never meant to do anything more than hang out with each other platonically as pals," said noted evolutionary scientist Dr. Janet Karberg, adding that humans are genetically hardwired in such a way that getting involved romantically can only "ruin everything" between two people. "The true biological imperative of male and female humans is to enjoy long-lasting friendships that don't get bogged down in attraction or sexual tension in any way." Ideally, the report stated, men and women should just go to dinner or the movies every few weeks, hug at most, and then return home to masturbate in solitude
You, Mite Chudomiro, Keith Fliszary and 2 others like this.
Jessica Beyers Then how would our species survive?
Michael Keller Friends with benefits?
Stella Sidbee Richie i guess we weren't meant to Jess,
an accident of nature! hahahahha!!
Stella Sidbee Richie HAHAHAHHAHHAHA
mikey you're onto something! LMAO!!
Michael Keller Sure, sex = procreation.
Doesn't mean you have to spend forever together. ;-)
Jessica Beyers But human babies are pretty useless
and require a lot of time and nurturing which is a lot easier when the tasks are divided
Stella Sidbee Richie happy april fools you guys!! hehehehe
Jessica Beyers Haha, well there you have it! =0)
Stella Sidbee Richie hahahahaha! yes :D i'm terrified of
pranks tho, scared of getting a heart attack, there are some pretty evil
ones out there LOL!! i have a wak heart!
Stella Sidbee Richie *weak
Jessica Beyers I just keep forgetting that it's april
fools and so am a great candidate for being mislead lol
Stella Sidbee Richie hahahhaha! well if u have friends like i